I'm hoping you all get a good laugh out of the following blog entry. If not, I'm clearly not doing my job entertaining you all properly, and I should just quit while I'm ahead (if only by a bit) ...
For a month or so in Sydney, I worked weekends as a bartender in a busy after-hours dance club in my neighbourhood. Good cash, nice co-workers ... lots of stories to share. lol One Friday night I was starting a shift when one of the other bartenders asked me if I was entering a cake into the annual charity cake auction the bar hosts every year, which was being held two days later. (As IF nobody told me about this before??!!) I had zero time to make anything myself, and the truth is that I was short on an inspiring theme for my cake. Note: THIS is one of the many situation when it's key to have creative friends in your entourrage. Knowing that last some of last year's cake entries auctioned for more than $3000 (no joke) made me want to make sure I was entering something worthy.
My aussie friend Drew (all credit for my cake entry goes to Drew) had a great idea, sure to get everyone's auction-hands in the air. Background: Kate Moss (european supermodel, represents several big-name fashion labels, including Burberry) got caught doing drugs last year and pictures were published in some of the gossip magazines in the U. K. Big scandal. Lost contracts / money. Apologies went out through her publicist. The whole thing. Big story (apparently). Although I was only vaguely aware (interested?) of the story, Drew (whose makes his career as a very successful publicist) assured me a cake with this theme would be a big hit.
And so began "Kate Moss's Burberry Blueberry Apology Cheesecake", complete with cigarettes and Tic Tacs (what else to supermodels eat?), fake euros, fake drugs ... and a copy of her statement of apology to her fans. So tragic. *grin*
I entered my cake into the Best Decorated category. When I got the bar following judging, I'm sad to say my cake didn't even get an honourable mention. No ribbons for yours truly. :(
Here were my competitors, first place on the left, second in the middle ... the third place didn't deserve it. I was irrate.
The Professionally Decorated category really was amazing. Truly works of art which made you wonder whether or not they really were cakes at all.
(This is where I bring in the humour) The auction naturally had an "auctioneer" working the microphone, trying to get everyone to open their pocketbooks for charity. Cakes were brought out one-by-one. Before the auction began, a friend of mine remarked that they saw my cake second-in-line. (?? Which seemed quite odd given the huge number of entries, and that mine hadn't placed) Someone told the "auctioneer" I worked at the bar, I was asked to go up with my cake ... and then somehow (I'm still not sure how this happened) I was standing in front of a few hundred people, shirtless, trying to sell my cake. (Why does it seem I have a hard time keeping my shirt on??) Result: Kevin's cake sold for $250 for charity, lots of laughs (I think), and there may have been a picture in one of the local newspapers. *sigh* "It was all in the name in charity", though ... right?
Confession: I didn't make the cheesecake - I BOUGHT it. (I didn't have time, or the means, to bake it ... honest)
Truth is, I've make many a cheesecake in my day. I made so many cheesecake for girlfriends in university the nickname "Cheesecake Bitch" was beginning to stick (thankfully I lost it post-graduation). Cheesecakes are WAY easier to make than most people realize. The one thing you need? Time. You need to bake your cake slowly at a low temperature to avoid 'browning" your cake and to promote less "cracking".
** Note: Basic cheesecake recipe soon to come ...
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